International Experience

Hello, my name is Joey, and I’m a German exchange student who was in the USA for a semester.

About 4 and a half years ago, I took this one amazing journey that changed my whole life. When I first started thinking about becoming an exchange student, it wasn’t really about the culture or language, although I knew my English could use some improvement.

It was about getting away from those everyday struggles we all know: getting up for school every morning, doing homework, meeting friends.

Every single day. There wasn’t anything special about this. Some friends were planning to go on exchange, and I thought, “Maybe I could do this too?!”

Growing up with divorced parents has left its marks in my personality, and I couldn’t connect with any father figure that I had in my life. But when I came to the U.S. on exchange, I joined such a nice host family, even those deeply burned scars began to heal.

From that moment, I didn’t feel lonely anymore! I had so many amazing days: meeting new people, going out, doing sports – sometimes just being lazy and eating delicious cookies. Every day was special, some more than others, but they were still special!

It wasn’t just about the good days though. It was more about the good people I got to know and learned to love. They have become such a huge part of my life and helped me grow the personality that I have today.

I didn’t expect any of it, but the culture and the people I got to know changed my life so much that I was finally able to live my life as I wanted. My general mood changed from negative to positive, I started looking at things differently and didn’t take it for granted. I just finally started to enjoy life as everybody should.

If there is one thing I learned from this experience: love. Caring for people. Looking back, so many positive feelings are connected to my exchange semester that I can’t possibly imagine that it was real. It feels more like a dream, a very optimistic dream that I luckily had!

Exchange Student’s Family Opens Their Doors to American Hosts 

Guest blog by Mindy O’Bannon, Host Mom in Houston

The thing about taking a long-awaited trip abroad to experience another culture and all the history that comes with it is you can’t really process it all until you get back home to the mundane, as if everything you did was somehow a dream. You intentionally try to be present in the moment, but it still manages to escape your grasp.

While hosting Jessie on exchange from Madrid, Spain, over the last year, her wonderful family graciously invited us to come spend nearly two weeks in their home during the summer.  Words cannot adequately express how thankful we are for the opportunity that was given to us. Jessie, her accomplished brother, and her generous parents served as our tour guides through the breathtaking sights and sounds of Madrid, Segovia, Barcelona, and Toledo. We tasted new foods (hello, baby eels and jamón serrano!), saw magnificent architecture, enjoyed world-renowned art, strolled medieval streets, experienced the rhythm of life on Spanish time (sleeping in late, lunch at 3, dinner at 11, to bed around 1 a.m.—because it’s still light after 10!), and lingered over café con leches on the patio.

Our two children, ages 9 and 14, saw history leap off the pages of their textbooks and marveled at structures that date back to biblical times—an education that has hopefully opened their eyes to a bigger world full of beautiful people.

Family Trip to Barcelona – Park Guell

Sure, we could have stayed in a hotel, but lodging with Jessie and her family blessed us with an authentic, engaging experience. Besides going on an exciting vacation, our family was able to better appreciate what Jessie went through while she was with us. It’s not always easy being a house guest, eating different food and being immersed in a foreign language far from the familiar, but the lessons learned are invaluable and more than worth it. What a true cultural exchange—one that has forever enriched our lives and further extended our bonds to a family in Spain we have grown to love dearly.

Since Jessie went back home and we’ve had time to settle into our normal routine following our trip to visit her, we’ve realized starting the new school year will look a little different for our family. There will be one less person in carpool, fewer runs to the shopping mall, and no more trips to basketball practice.

But that hole will be filled with many wonderful memories of helping a student enjoy the experience of a lifetime.

When friends ask us whether we would do it all over again, I answer with an enthusiastic “Yes!” and encourage them to do the same.  But my recommendation also comes with a warning:  Chances are extremely high that when you let a foreign-exchange student into your home, they’ll steal away with a piece of your heart.

Family trip to Barcelona – Montserrat

If “home is where the heart is,” then exchange students Johanna from Germany and Jade from South Africa have found new roots – and a new home – in a small town neither girl could have guessed would so quickly captivate their hearts.

“Jenison is a very friendly community,” remembers Jade, “and the people are always willing to help.” 

Jade and Johanna are high school exchange students who stayed with the Boucher family during the 2016-2017 school year. The Bouchers hosted Johanna during the first semester, and Jade during the second. Host mom Sarah Boucher, who is also an exchange coordinator with iE, shares that her family of 6 never misses an opportunity to host.

“Our whole family loves having these kids around,” shares Sarah, “and it’s such an important learning experience for my own children. They learn about the world in a very personal way. It’s life-changing for them and for us.”

Jade and Johanna agree, and the girls will always remember the special moments they shared together.

“I think my favorite memories of my host family are those made during talks while driving somewhere or baking with my host siblings or just making jokes at the dinner table,” remembers Johanna.  “It’s the small things that are important to me and that I still remember.” 

And while these sweet memories win a special place in the scrapbook, Johanna shares that it’s the more intimate details of day-to-day life that taught her the most.

“I learned to be independent and handle my life without my parents,” she remembers, “but also to be more self-confident. Before my exchange year, I didn’t really like to talk to strangers – but in order to find friends that’s exactly what I had to do!” 

And while both students have since returned to their home countries, they feel such gratitude for the Boucher family that they’re sure to return as soon as possible.

“I definitely want to visit my host family again and we still keep in touch!” shares Johanna. 

The exchange student experience isn’t always easy, and for many students it’s a valuable growing experience. Upon reviewing the time in Jenison, Jade is thankful for the life lessons she learned as a result of her stay with her generous host family and community. 

“I learned that you should always follow your dreams and step outside your comfort zone,” shares Jade. “You meet new people, you try new things, and it’s an experience that no one can understand except you!” 

And though the notion of student exchange may loom as a romanticized ideal, Johanna found that it’s actually the personal relationships that brought her exchange year to life.

“I don’t know what I would have done without my host family,” she shares. “They helped me to build a life in a new country and treated me like part of their family from the first day. They were complete strangers to me in the beginning but now a big and important part of my life. I’m more than grateful!”

While many central Texans unwind during the last lazy days of summer, Teal Scott, an exchange student coordinator for iE-USA, is working overtime.

“We have over 35 students left looking for a host home before August 31,” shares Teal, “and I know so many of the families in our area will be so blessed by the chance to host! So I’m out there spreading the word!” 

Teal loves making personal connections and providing hands-on support to each of her families, which is a trademark of iE-USA.

“We’re all about living real life together,” shares Texas Regional Director Susan Krneta. “Our families keep coming back because they love the close-knit bonds they form with these brave kids.” 

Because iE is a small organization, we’re able to maintain unrivaled standards of care and quality, including selection, communication, and support. On-the-ground support from coordinators like Teal is just one tangible way iE strives to fulfill their mission to be “a unique organization where people come first.” And with a consistently “excellent” rating with the Department of State, each family and student is fully vetted, approved, trained and equipped – which means everyone gets started on the right foot! 

Local host family Sid and Carren Cavanaugh of North Richland Hills have felt this support during their many hosting experiences with iE.

 “The beautiful part about the whole thing is, it’s not a job.  . . it’s an experience,” shares Sid.  “You mentor them and guide them just like you would your own children, getting to learn each other’s cultures and continually growing together. Lifetime connections are made.” And with his classic coy smile, Sid added,  “It must be a really good experience or we wouldn’t continue to host year after year!”

But what is it about iE that promotes such strong bonds? For over a decade, the focus of this family-oriented organization has been on quality, not quantity – which means every student receives a unique placement, and every host family works closely with a local coordinator to select just the right match. Host families can be any “shape and size,” from a single adults with no children, a family with young children, or an older retired couple. Hosts provide meals, a spare bed, and the basic logistical help any teenager would need. And since “real-life” cultural immersion is the goal, host families aren’t expected to provide extravagant vacations or lavish experiences – just the warmth of a family and a place to call “home!”  

Potential hosts often have many of the same questions: “What if we’re traveling during the year?” or “What if we’re very busy?” or “What if I run into a difficult situation with my student?” And the answer to just about every one of these questions remains the same:

“We work with each person to find the best solution,” shares RD Susan Krneta, “whether that means working through travel logistics or troubleshooting a surprise issue. That’s one of the benefits of our smaller size – we really can support each placement on a case-by-case basis!” 

Teal shares that the most exciting part of being an exchange coordinator is helping a student find a new home. And If “home is where the heart is,” then exchange student Nele from Germany has found new roots – and a new home – in a small Texas town she never guessed would so quickly captivate her heart. “Ponder is a small town, where everyone knows each other,” shares Nele, “and everyone was super excited to meet me!”

Nele, who stayed with the Klotz family, will always remember the special moments they shared together.

“My host family means a lot to me, they took me as their second child,” shares Nele, “I’m so lucky to have had them, and I hope that this relationship lasts for a life time!”

Since student exchange affects the whole community, many schools are taking notice of the obvious educational benefits. As the world becomes more and more integrated, “cultural competency” is an important new skill, with many schools actively working to equip their students for a global marketplace.

 “Bringing exchange students into the school adds perspective,” shares Erik Ostergren, Dean of Students at Westside High School in Houston, TX.  “The only way many of our students can get exposure to the world and develop global awareness is to have people from different countries come to them. And when students learn alongside international students, they start thinking about the world differently.”

 

What is it like to add an exchange student to your family? How do they “fit in”?

Host mom and Local Coordinator Pam Moore shares her story of building a life-long relationship with her host daughter, Laura.

I had talked to Laura by FaceTime, text, and email for 4 months before she arrived, so she was somewhat prepared for our crazy, loud family! But I am not sure we were prepared for a new daughter who would get off the plane and immediately feel like part of the family!

Since she arrived there was nothing I asked her to try that she was not up for. She fell in love with Falcons Football! She had never run cross country and she joined the team. She was near last, but that never stopped her. Her first meet it was so hot she got sick. Most people would have quit…but not her!

She lost her German accent and it has been replaced by what we jokingly call a “Red Neck German accent!”  Her teachers and coaches love her, and she has made so many friends.

She has a good head on her shoulders and was committed to having the best exchange year possible. She wrote me a letter for Mothers Day and the one thing she said that stands out is…”when I first got here I never thought I would love you and your family as much as I do.”

That’s what makes this such a great experience. A person comes into your life and family, and 10 months later, it is their family too!

I knew I would love her!

Famous last words, or the start of an epic adventure?

Luckily for Kelly and Andy Feulner, it was the beginning of something great.

“We don’t have kids of our own, so when the opportunity to host came up on the VolunteerMatch website, we thought, ‘Why not give this a shot!'” remembers host mom Kelly.

The Feulners welcomed Henrik from Germany to their Kentucky home in the fall of 2016, and through their experience with other teens they knew the importance of keeping busy with activities.

“The transition was really smooth,” remembers Kelly. “For the first couple of weekends, we always had something going on, something to look forward to!”

When asked why they jumped into hosting, they laughed and said, “Why not!”

“We thought it’d be a nice way to learn about someone else – an adventure! They’re very brave at that age to leave home and live with strangers. It’s really an admirable thing these kids are doing! It was exciting to be a part of that.”

Kelly and Andy have always been curious about culture, and that’s one reason they were drawn to the idea of hosting.

“We got to learn a lot about Henrik & the German culture. Our understanding came from history books – OUR side of history! And that’s something that attracted us to Henrik’s application when we were looking at student applications – he wrote that he wanted to share his ‘Euro identity’ – and that was just what we wanted.”

From the beginning, they welcomed Henrik as though he was their own son, which made the experience all the more rewarding. But one of the biggest thrills came surprisingly at the end of the year, when the Feulners hosted Henrik’s parents – and discovered they could easily become fast friends!

“Henrik’s parents stayed with us for 10 days, and they were super nice! They were the same age as us, with the same sense of humor. It was just such a great time with such great people, and now we really want to see them again too!”

When asked about their most memorable experience, the Feulner’s answer may seem surprising, yet it’s so fitting with many families’ experiences.

“Right now the biggest part we’re telling everyone is just how hard it was to say goodbye. We had NO idea how gut-wrenching it would be to say goodbye! Even the animals miss him – it took our cat a while not to look for him! There is a bond there, and there’s a piece of our family that is missing and gone.”

In the end, the Feulners are so glad they took the leap into hosting!

“We are better people because of the time with him in our family. It was an experience that was absolutely worth our time. If you like kids, consider hosting. You’re making a difference in someone’s life.

Just be warned – they’re going to get under your skin and attached to your heartstrings.”

This summer, two Illinois sisters who share a passion for FAMILY are teaming up!  One is pursuing a missional adoption, and the other works tirelessly to help high school exchange students find a host home. Using our $200 referral program, Lacey Landwehr and Amanda Mesecher (pictured above) have joined forces to help BOTH their passions thrive – the ultimate win/win!

Dustin and Lacey Landwehr and their 4 children live on a farm in their rural hometown of Kewanee.  After several short-term mission trips to Haiti installing solar panels for the Canaan Christian Community orphanage, the Landwehrs felt a calling to do even more.

“Adoption had never been on our radar,” shares Lacey, “but when we were there in Haiti we decided it was something we should definitely pursue!”

After much prayer, the Landwehr family decided they would adopt a child from Haiti, and the first step for any adoptive family is to raise the necessary funds!

“We’re trying to find little ways to raise money without asking too much of people. We hosted a ‘cut-a-thon’ which actually went really well – because everybody needs a haircut!”

It was Lacey’s sister, Amanda, who had the idea to combine their interests and efforts in a mutually beneficial fundraising project. As a Local Coordinator for iE, Amanda is actively looking for families who are willing to provide a supportive environment for incoming students.

“I was trying to think of a way to help them make some money for the adoption,” said Amanda. “And this way, we can help more than one family!”

iE offers a referral bonus of $200, paid to anyone in the community who refers a viable host family (when the family decides to host for a 5 or 10 month exchange program). Amanda realized this was an amazing opportunity for her sister’s family to really build their fundraising account!

“With the referral bonus being $200,” shares Amanda, “I decided to match it using the money from my Local Coordinator payment! So that means for every family who Lacey finds to host a student, their family gets $400 to go toward the adoption! And the best part is, everybody wins – It benefits the family adopting, the exchange student, the family hosting, and me as the Local Coordinator.”

Lacey has already been able to refer two families who have decided to host a student, which means TWO students have gained a family for the school year, AND it means $800 will be added to the Landwehr adoption fund!

The Waltons, close friends of both Lacey and Amanda, are one of of the families who have already jumped on board.

“I grew up with exchange students in school,” shares Jen, “and I always thought it would be a neat adventure. When I saw they were teaming up to help Lacey with the adoption, that really caught my interest in a bigger way.”

The Walton family will be hosting Lucia from Spain. Jen recounts how excited and nervous they were to video chat with Lucia and her family for the first time just a few days ago!

“I was nervous, to be honest, because of the difference in our way of living,” Jen laughed. “We live in a series of cornfields, and she lives in an apartment in Madrid! But the video chat helped me see that she’s just so excited about this experience, and her parents are really excited too.”

With just over a month left to place the remaining exchange students in Kewanee host homes, Amanda and Lacey are working to connect with more local families who may be interested in hosting. To help boost the Landwehr’s adoption fund, host families can temporarily “adopt” a high school exchange student for 5 or 10 months! And while the hosting experience is only temporary, the resulting relationships last a lifetime.

Would you like to contribute to the effort AND bring your family a fun adventure this fall?

Contact Amanda Mesecher at 309-333-7167 or a.mesecher@international-experience.net!

Why would a single parent of two teenage girls sign up to host an exchange student? Let’s hear from host mom Charlotte Powell to find out!

Thanks for being here Charlotte! Can you tell us – What was it that made you decide to host?

I saw an ad in the local newspaper asking for host families. My girls were with me so we started talking about it and we all thought it would be cool to learn about other cultures.  I always wanted my girls to know a much bigger world than just their hometown. Hosting seemed like the perfect way to introduce all of us to the bigger picture. And it has is so many ways!

After a year together what do you take away as your favorite memory?

This is hard as there are so many. I guess one of my favorite isn’t something specific but that moment when your host daughter becomes a member of the family and no longer feels like a guest. It might be they come downstairs in their pajamas with their hair a mess or when they laugh so hard they snort. I can remember the year I hosted two girls the exact moment it happened for me. I was in my room watching The Bachelorette (I know, don’t judge me but I love it!) and within a few minutes of the show starting both my girls and both exchange students were in my room sprawled across the bed picking our favorite bachelor. I quit watching the show and found myself the mother of four beautiful girls, not just two anymore. I don’t know how it happened, but it did. We were family just like that. In pajamas, talking trash about each other’s picks and laughing.

Where have your students come from?

I have hosted girls from Thailand, Germany and Montenegro. Next year I will have a girl from Spain.

Although they are from different countries, what did you find that was similar among the girls?

They are all teenagers. Teens aren’t that much different no matter where they come from. They all had a natural curiosity, respect, and sense of adventure. They also had a wonderful grasp of our language!

If you could give one piece of advice to a potential host family, what would it be?

It’s important to be understanding of a few things. First, as I said a moment ago, these are teenagers who will act just like teenagers no matter where they are from. They are not adults and will not behave like adults. They might make some bad decisions, they might get moody, they might even roll their eyes, but they need you to guide them and be patient with them and just like any teenager, they will surprise you with love when you least expect it. They will give you a host mom mother’s day card or bake you a cake for your birthday. Treat these kids as if they were your own, because for ten months, they are. Give them chores, take the phone away for a while, hug them, listen to them, ask them questions, get to know them.

Second, don’t try to change who they are. Appreciate the uniqueness they bring to your home. Embrace the culture clash. Laugh when moments get tense and don’t let things that annoy you go. Talk about them or they build up and become big issues.

How was hosting for your daughters? Did they immediately hit it off or did it take some time?

For each girl we hosted it was a little different. We have learned to do some activities together almost as soon as the student arrives. It is easier and more comfortable for us, to get to know them while doing something. We go boating, tubing, water skiing. It’s really hard for a student to be shy while being pulled behind a boat on a tube. But generally speaking it takes a little while for real connections to be made, but friendships begin quickly. My girls love to go to the airport with me to pick up the student. They want to start to get to know them immediately. The exchange students seem to want that too. They do experience differences in opinions and ideas, but they work through it.

When speaking with people who are interested in hosting, one question we often receive is “does it cost a lot.” How would you answer that based on your experiences?

This was actually one of my questions when I first considered hosting. I am a single mom on a teacher’s salary so I don’t have a large bank account but I still felt I had a lot to offer an exchange student. I think the best answer is hosting will cost as much or as little as you choose. As a host family you are only expected to provide three meals a day and housing. However, if you are like me, you occasionally do a little more.  International Experience does a great job preparing these kids with the expectation that they buy what they need and any extras they want to do. They know what they are supposed to pay for and do so willingly. I have not noticed any increase in my utilities or grocery bill either. I do buy more cereal than I did before, the students I have hosted really like our sugary American cereal….Applejack’s in particular! But other than that, no real change in my budget. Even when I hosted two students at once, I never really noticed much change in my monthly budget.

Communication is also important here. When I took the two exchange students and my two daughters on a beach vacation, both exchange students pitched in for the house we rented and were happy to do it. In fact, we talked ahead of time about what each could contribute and then rented a house that fit all our budgets. I couldn’t have paid for the house for the larger family on my own, but we really wanted to do a family vacation so we just openly talked about the money and how it would work. Just be open and upfront about what they will pay for before doing something. If we were going to a high school basketball game I would tell the student before we left the house, “make sure to bring money with you for your ticket or snack”, or I would say, “hey, tonight I will be buying your ticket so you can save some money to go out with friends this week.” We just dealt with it all up front so there was never any awkwardness confusion for either of us. Even now in the beginning of communication with the girl I will be hosting in August, I email the cost of cheer uniform, volleyball team shirt, and such so she is prepared for most of the initial costs she will incur when she arrives. Communication is really important in finances.

You have hosted a single placement (just one student) as well as a double placement (two students at the same time) – which do you prefer?

Personally I like both situations. When I hosted two, my family felt so much bigger, not financially, but in depth. Lots more conversation, more personalities, more laughter. I love hosting just one student as well. You definitely get to know them faster since your time isn’t divided and they were able to have their own room. When I hosted two, the girls shared a room. The said they loved it though! I think I will host two again in 2018-19.

Did you feel supported while hosting your students?

International Experience offers so many ways to get help and support while you are hosting but the most immediate and accessible help comes from the local coordinator. My local coordinator is a young woman named Liane. Liane helps me from day one. She makes sure my application is done completely and accurately. Then she helps me choose a student whose is suited to my family based on our interests and hobbies. She doesn’t get frustrated no matter how many times I ask to see one more profile of a student or how many times I call or email her with the questions. Liane has been at the airport to meet each student when they arrive so the student has a face to match the name. Liane contacts me and the student at least once a month, to check in and see how things are going. This past year I contacted her several times at the beginning of the school year because I knew my exchange daughter was really struggling with homesickness and I couldn’t seem to help. Liane called and visited the student and really pulled her out of the depression she was in. By the way, Liane is amazingly encouraging and good at her job. While I am new to some of the emotions and feelings a student may be going through, Liane has worked for IE for years and knows the struggles these kids face and knows how to help them and the family make it through. All I have ever had to do was call IE or Liane and they helped me through anything I needed help with from changing flights, to the student not engaging, Dr visits to staying with us longer. IE wants this to be a positive experience for both student and family and they go the extra mile to make sure it is.

Let’s talk about commitment. What commitment did you make when you said “yes” to hosting?

Hosting a student is a commitment to love a child, plus three meals and a bed. Mostly it is a commitment to be a parent to someone else child but to treat them as though they are your own. It is to get annoyed, frustrated and then to get over it and love them anyway. It is a commitment to protect the student while they are here but to let them make choices and mistakes along the way. It’s a commitment to be open to learn new things and to teach about those things you value and hold dear. It’s a committee to listen and to share your life with a person who comes to you as a stranger but leaves as a member of your family. It’s not about giving the student everything like trips, events and entertainment. It’s about giving them another place to call home.

The 4th of July embodies so much of what we treasure as Americans: a celebration of our nation, our FREEDOMS, and our families.

That’s what makes those sparklers shine all the brighter: the unique pride that comes as we watch our children scramble to catch fireflies, knowing their future is bright. Believing they will run and reach for their own unique version of the American Dream.

It’s this same “American Dream” that inspires so many foreign teenagers to leave the comfort of their homes and families and put on a completely new life!

Chances are, you’re delighting in your own family this holiday weekend, as you should be! But did you know there’s an enthusiastic teen halfway around the world who’s just waiting to experience your life with you?

Just imagine…

• Taking your new German exchange daughter to a baseball game!
• Teaching your Thai host son how to cook the perfect summer burger! 
• Treating your Italian “plus one” to a movie in the park!

THESE are the experiences that make student exchange so memorable!

This Independence Day, consider a NEW possibility and a NEW purpose! SHARE your America with a student who so desperately wants to experience it!

Are you ready?